Daily Reflections May 1, 2016

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HEALING HEART AND MIND

Admitted to God. To ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS p.55

Since it is true that God comes to me through people, I can see that by keeping people at a distance I also keep God at a distance. God is nearer to me than I think and I can experience Him by loving people and allowing people to love me. But I can neither love not be loved if I allow my secrets to get in the way. 

It’s the side of myself that I refuse to look at that rules me. I must be willing to look at the dark side in order to heal my mind and heart because that is the road to freedom. I must walk into darkness to find the light and walk into fear to find peace. 

By revealing my secrets-and thereby ridding myself of guilt-I can actually change my thinking; by altering my thinking, I can change myself. My thoughts create my future. What I will be tomorrow is determined by what I think today. 

We Lose A Lot In Our Addictions; What Do We Gain In Sobriety?

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First and foremost, here is a thought I would like to share with you. All of us that are in recovery and sobriety can still get drunk. Your probably thinking; “What the hell is she talking about! I can’t drink! I can’t get drunk? How dare her say she is sober and then say this!”. Well, let me elaborate. The picture below hit home for me in a very deep place in my heart and so I would like to share it with you as well. Please remember that with an open mind we can learn, and adopt new joys and experiences. Enjoy!

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(Note: Not with wine, but with those things in life that gives you, personally, a feeling of absolute joy. Get drunk on those things! I love this concept, I hope this does not offend. If it does offend or bring up something negative for anyone I sincerely apologize!)

Now, down to business!

I was in Treatment yesterday and one of the classes I was in went over the things that we lose while we are actively in our addiction, and what we gain when we enter the world of sobriety. There were 9-10 people in the class including me and as you would assume there were a lot of different things that came up while thinking of this subject. I tried my very best to write each one down so that I could share them all with you. I hope it inspires and empowers you to know how much positive comes after we let go of the negative. Your always in my thoughts!

Cycle Of Addiction

Tangible Losses In Active Addiction

  • Losing a Job
  • Losing a Car
  • Relationships
  • Losing a Home
  • Losing freedom; Jail or prison time; DUI
  • Losing kids to CPS
  • Health deterioration
  • Death
  • Losing Family
  • Losing the privilege to drive
  • Money
  • Crashing a car
  • Loss of the sense of responsibility
  • Loss of a safe environment
  • Hospitalizations

Intangible Losses Of Active Addiction

  • Self-esteem
  • Morals
  • Loss of time
  • Self-respect
  • Confidance
  • Motivation
  • Ambition
  • Acountability
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Psychosis
  • Dignity
  • Integrity
  • Apathy
  • Desire to live
  • Ability to forgive
  • Denial
  • Taking safety and trust away from our kids and causing trauma
  • Boundaries

What We Obtain  In Recovery Through Honest Change

  • Self-worth
  • Peace of mind
  • Sanity
  • Health
  • Quality of life
  • Relationships
  • Credibility
  • Honesty
  • Faith
  • Hope
  • AA Promises
  • A future
  • Strength
  • Empathy
  • Passion
  • Compassion
  • Humility
  • Ability to forgive
  • Ability to face resentments
  • Taking accountability for our part in things
  • Higher power
  • Spirituality
  • Connection to life

Change in recovery is an inside job and takes a lot of foot work. I have a tattoo on my foot inspired by this concept that says, “Be the change ye wish to see in thou world”. To be a change or to obtain change we have to do a lot of foot work and always take the next indicated step. The more foot steps we take to get out of the wrecked realities of our addictions, the closer we get to all the positive aspects of life-some that we have never even experienced before-if that’s not inspiring I don’t know what is.

I believe that everything I endured in my addiction and in my childhood happened for a reason. My addiction was a result of the pain, suffering, and trauma I endured throughout the first 16 years of my life. After that I began causing more trauma, heart ache, and suffering for myself. Now that I am clean and sober I have a lot within me to offer to others as a hand to pick them up, as a kind work to lift their spirit, a wisdom to offer when times are hard and a solution is hard to find, and most importantly, I have a connection to God that is stronger than it has ever been before. God is the reason why I can offer myself to others in such a beautiful way. Your story is the same, you have God as well in your story, and with God and his will for us we can accomplish miracles!

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THE TREASURE OF…

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THE TREASURE OF THE PAST-DAILY REFLECTION-January 28, 2014

“Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing which makes life seem so worth while to us now. Cling to the thought that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have-the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them.” – ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS BIG BOOK p. 124

“What a gift it is for me to realize that all those seemingly useless years were not wasted. The most degrading and humiliating experiences turn out to be the most powerful tools in helping others to recover. In knowing the depths of shame and despair, I can reach out with a loving and compassionate hand, and know that the grace of God is available to me.” – DAILY REFLECTIONS-Written by AA members for AA members.

I Phone 5C 012

RIGOROUS HONEST…

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RIGOROUS HONESTY-DAILY REFLECTION; SUNDAY, JANUARY 26, 2014

“Who wishes to be rigorously honest and tolerant? Who wants to confess his faults to another and make restitution for harm done? Who cares anything about a Higher Power, let alone meditation and prayer? Who wants to sacrifice time and energy in trying to carry A.A.’s message to the next sufferer? No, the average alcoholic, self-centered in the extreme, doesn’t care for this prospect-unless he has to do these things in order to stay alive himself.” TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 24

“I am an alcoholic. If I drink I will die. My, what power, energy, and emotion this simple statement generates in me! But it’s really all I need to know for today. Am I willing to stay alive today? Am I willing to stay sober today? Am I willing to ask for help and am I willing to be a help to another suffering alcoholic today? Have I discovered the fatal nature of my situation? What must i do, today, to stay sober?

-DAILY REFLECTIONS; This is a book of reflections by A.A. members for A.A. members.